Men can really drive you crazy, can’t they? And, go figure, they feel the same way about us. But when the guy who was once so smitten with you suddenly does an about-face, twisting things around and treating you like you’re nuts, it might be a sign of something more than the usual day-to-day frustrations. You could be the victim of “gaslighting.”
So, what is gaslighting?
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse in which the one doing it tries to get power over his victim by making her think she’s crazy, out of sorts and “off.” The gaslighter lies to, manipulates and questions the other person for control. And though it can happen with your boss, a parent or friends, it’s perhaps most common in romantic relationships. In guy-girl couples, it’s often the man in the abuser role and the woman as the victim, but it can work the other way around too.“The more powerful gaslighter attempts to define the reality of a less powerful gaslightee — and the person in the one-down position allows that to happen,” Dr. Robin Stern, a licensed psychotherapist and the author of The Gaslight Effect, says in her Psychology Today blog.
Red flags that your man is gaslighting you and how to handle it:
1. You’re often left feeling confused and crazy
If your guy frequently tells you you’re crazy and twists things around so that it seems like you’re being irrational or unreasonable, that’s a telltale red flag he’s gaslighting you. And if you feel confused a lot and actually believe you’re losing it, that’s an ominous sign, too.
2. You keep doubting yourself
Gaslighting victims start believing their abuser’s perception of reality instead of their own. “The gaslightee begins to second-guess herself because she has allowed another person to define her reality and erode her judgment,” Stern says. So if your guy is constantly raising his eyebrows at you and spins things in such a way that you seriously doubt your own version of events, take a long, hard look at what’s going on.
Read original article here:Catherine Donaldson-Evans
Also of interest watch video: https://youtu.be/0ToLfQU2xmg
In 1821, a man named William Hart dug the first natural gas wellin the United States on the banks of Canadaway Creek in my home town of Fredonia, New York. The well was 27 feet deep, was excavated by hand using shovels, and its gas pipeline consisted of hollowed out logs sealed with tar and rags. Natural gas was soon transported to businesses and street lights in town. These lights frequently attracted travelers, often causing them to make a significant detour to see this new “wonder.” Expanding on Hart’s work, the Fredonia Gas Light Company was formed in 1858, becoming the first American natural gas company.
Gas lighting is thus an inexorable part of my personal history. But I’m even more interested in gaslighting.
In the 1938 play Gaslight, a murderous husband is intent on inducing instability in his wife in order to accommodate his venality. When she notices that he has dimmed the gaslights in their house, he tells her she is imagining things—that they are as bright as ever – as a way to get her to question her senses and her sanity. The British play became a classic 1944 American filmfrom George Cukor, starring Ingrid Bergman as the heroine and Charles Boyer as her abusive spouse, out to convince her that reality is not what she perceives. In this sort of story, our most dangerous enemies are always those closest to us, masquerading as lovers and friends. Gaslight reminds us how uniquely terrifying it can be to mistrust the evidence of our senses and of what we know to be true…
Read original article here: https://rpseawright.wordpress.com/2016/05/04/financial-gaslighting/
Gaslighting – The practice of brainwashing or convincing a mentally healthy individual that they are going insane or that their understanding of reality is mistaken or false. The term “Gaslighting” is based on the 1944 MGM movie “Gaslight”.
Casting You as the Crazy One
In the classic suspense thriller, Gaslight, Paula (Ingrid Bergman) marries the villainous Gregory Anton (Charles Boyer), not realizing that he is the one who murdered her aunt and is now searching for her missing jewels.
To cover up his treachery, he tries to persuade Paula that she is going mad, so he can search the attic for the jewels without her interference. He plants missing objects on her person in order to make her believe that she has no recollection of reality. He tries to isolate her, not allowing her to have visitors or to leave the house.
If this sounds somehow familiar, you have probably encountered the form of psychological abuse we call Gaslighting. Essentially, it describes forms of manipulation which are designed to make the victim lose their grip on the truth or doubt their perception of reality…
Also see: http://outofthefog.website/top-100-trait-blog/2015/11/4/gaslighting